Anonymous 5

Sasha Sobol: What are your definitions of “man” and “woman?”

Anonymous 5:  A man is the guy with a dick and a woman is the person without a dick.

SS: Is that all there is to it?

A: I believe it’s the differences in their bodies and maybe in their minds.

SS: Are there any gender roles that you think should be there and are there any that you wish didn’t exist?

A: I don’t care.

SS: Do you conform to society’s gender expectations?

A: Mostly.

SS: For the “mostly” part, is it more because society expects you to or because you identify with the expectations?

A: I don’t “identify” with the expectations. I don’t feel like anything different would suit me.

SS: Is there anything that you do that might not be usually associated with your gender?

A:  I can’t think of anything a teenager would do that wouldn’t be specifically associated with their gender unless it’s something that would not be done often. Would you please explain your question?

SS: There are things that stereotypically teenage boys do and there are things that stereotypically teenage boys don’t do. Is there anything that you do that stereotypically teenage boys don’t do?

A: Let’s see... I don’t wear skirts, I don’t wear high heels, I do not play with barbies. I don’t know, I cannot think of an example of something that teenage boys stereotypically don’t do that I do. Because all the examples that I can think of that teenage boys stereotypically don’t do are kind of stupid. Give me an example please.

SS: Like caring about your appearance, brushing your hair... So basically you’re saying that doing girly things is stupid?

A: No, I’m not saying that. First of all, all boys care about their appearance. Because if they didn’t, earth would be a little different. Appearance and hygiene.

SS: Do you think that they care about their appearance because society expects them to be a certain way?

A: No, they care about their appearance because they want popularity and most of them do not want to be too different.

SS: There are two situations I would like you to talk about once I mention the situations. So situation number one: A lot of the time when it’s socially acceptable for a man to show his chest, a woman has to cover hers and there are laws in certain places that prohibit women from showing their nipples. Situation number two: In formal wear especially, it’s acceptable for women to show their legs and arms and cleavage and men basically have to wear a suit and they can’t even wear shorts or something or anything other than a suit and they can’t really show much of their body. What do you think about these two situations and the relationship between the two?

A: In situation number one, I don’t think the laws should be there, but I do believe in situations when it’s appropriate for a man to show his chest but it [is not socially acceptable for a woman to do the same], it would be uncomfortable for women to show their chests. Situation number two is kind of fucked up, but men never really have the desire to show off their bodies and cleavage when women do have the option of wearing suits.

SS: are you saying all men want to wear suits or the majority of men?

A: I’m saying that the majority of male population of humans on Earth do not have desire of showing off their bodies. Although they might not like suits, they would not feel formal in a dress. Although there’s nothing wrong with it. And women simply have the option of wearing that shows off their bodies more and the only problem with that situation that I see is that some men basically do not have the option of appearing formal to society and showing off their cleavage at the same time.

SS: A lot of the time, women and girls are encouraged to embrace their masculine side. For example, if a girl wanted to play football, it would not be looked down upon  as much as if a boy wanted to do ballet, even though there are obviously professional male dancers. The point is that it’s a lot more acceptable for a woman to be masculine than for a man to be feminine. What do you think about that?

A: I think in time this will change because in recent history women have been discriminated against a lot more than men. Now humankind is trying to make up for that by giving women extra options. And I think that in a couple hundred years the world will hopefully be a lot more unisex than it is now.

SS: Kind of related to that is my last question. Do you think it’s important to make the world a more accepting place for gender nonconforming people and how can this be done if you think it’s the right thing to do?

A: Well, the only people who are not ok with such people are basically the people who discriminate against them and I don’t think there is any way to change that, as possibly their minds have been altered by their childhoods and what they have been taught. It would be impossible to get rid of such people or make them change your mind without including mass murder or imprisonment, which in this case is not very helpful.

SS: Why is masculinity valued as more than femininity and how is this related to discrimination in the workplace?

A: I think that masculinity is sometimes looked upon as better or more important because they are bigger. As they’re bigger and stronger, they were originally the leaders, although in modern society it is believed by most of the actually smart people that brain-wise the male and female human is equal overall although each has their advantages and disadvantages.

SS: Thank you.

Note: This interview was done in person.